For so many reasons, it is a strange time to be a blogger. Over the past couple months my writing has almost slowed to a halt and if my Instagram account was a child, I’m certain social services would have taken it away from me by now. I’m still active on my Twitter because it’s where I go to unleash my stupidity for the day and no week is complete without slightly trolling the Universal Studios Orlando account (because Halloween Horror Nights is king and everything else is bottom tier—I will not be taking questions at this time.).
For the most part my absence from the world of the internet has gone either unnoticed or was understandable considering the state of the world- especially Florida where we have become a joke to the rest of the world. Some have noticed my absence and decided it was important for them to comment about it in some weird ways. Like this one message I received on Instagram that I shall boil down because it was a rambling mess but the intent was clear- you have an influence online through a blog, Instagram and other digital means- why aren’t you saying more?
They are referencing my perceived silence on Black Lives Matter, which, I have more than once, brought up on Twitter and have posted about on Instagram. A big part of my social media absence is that it feels painfully stupid and selfish to go back to online business as usual on my social feed. My last post pretty much summed up all my feelings:
We can get into a greater debate about candy corn at another time.
When it comes to micro-blogging my feelings, I believe I have been clear on the subject. My mantra as of late has been “Wear a Mask and Arrest the Cops that Murdered Breonna Taylor”.
The reason I haven’t written in grander detail is because I don’t, honestly know what to say beyond, I’m still learning.
I’m shocked and appalled by how much we aren’t taught in school about the true history of our country. I’m hurting so much for all of those who are in pain, not just now, but through history. More-so I’m disgusted with the country I call home and the idiot that we put in charge of it. Granted, I didn’t vote for him but our shitty systems put him in the white house.
I am cis-gendered, gay white man. I am no expert on racial injustice. I didn’t choose my skin color and I can shed the privilege that it affords me. Whether I realize it or not, I am afforded far more than people of other racial groups, genders and ethnicities. I recognize this and I am angered by the fact that people with a different skin color or gender aren’t given those same privileges.
I’m beyond frustrated and I know that my emotions are nowhere near those who have endured so much more than I could possibly imagine.
So I’m learning.
I have spent the past two months educating myself, which I believe can be one of the best things anyone can do. Knowledge is power.
I feel it would be wildly self-involved to chronicle this learning process so rather I’ll share the books that I have purchased and been reading:
There is still so much to learn but this is the beginning. I’m more than open to anything else people can send my way to educate myself.
Beyond that, I’m heading the advice and following the lead of the people of color in my life. This is not my battle to lead but it sure is one that I’m going to fight in.